One is more than NONE! :P ;D
Now Dave, the fact that you have no butt actually works in our..er.. your..favor. More room for iron. Wear some baggy pants and fill 'em up and try not to clang too much when you leave. If he gets wise to it, just start runnin. You outta be able to outrun a 87 year old man, right? Even with a couple #3 or 5 oval roasters in your pants..one for you and one for me, right? You can do it, Dave..I know you can... :-*